The OR filter + Max Load pulling global records instead of filtered ones is a known limitation, Max Load can apply before the OR logic fully evaluates.
The reliable native workaround:
Use two separate lists:
List 1: Filter where sender = Logged In User, sort by Created date descending, Max Load 17
List 2: Filter where Question-receivers contains Logged In User, sort by Created date descending, Max Load 17
Place them in a vertical group (List 1 above List 2 for newest first overall).
This shows the newest 17 from each condition, combined sorted, no bugs, loads fast.